you have been adapted from the videogame soundtrack 

        of the award-winning musical reimagining

of the novel that saved your life

you float on a dented toilet at 30,000 feet

        61 grams of fat, 2,920 milligrams of sodium 

stretched out in lawn chair beneath your left eyelid 

traveling from Dallas is always like this

        experts say it's due to algorithm 

that replaces words in the Bible with flavors of ice cream 

(something like: #MyAge, 

        son of Isaiah, 

son of Cherry Vanilla )

you lean your head against the cool metal 

        the new strategy is dedicated, closed-end 

vehicles with 24-month lifecycle

welcome to the Duck Universe, 

        a spin-off of the Mickey universe 

that centers around Donald and rich uncle Scrooge McDuck

this story was different when the monster 

        only had three heads

(not thirty-three, with opposable thumbs)  

the schedule says you will be blowing 

        across the Middle Kingdom at the rate 

of 1,000 micrograms per cubic meter

        it will be a welcome change

dense regions of galactic halo

        a spiral galaxy with well-defined arms

        a universe you unwrapped one night 

on a ham and cheese cruise                       across a break room poster

        Virginia is for lovers