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DRUNK MONKEYS IS A Literary Magazine and Film Blog founded in 2011 featuring short stories, flash fiction, poetry, film articles, movie reviews, and more

Editor-in-chief KOLLEEN CARNEY-HOEPFNEr

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chris pruitt

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Election 2012: No, Virginia, The World Did Not Implode

I guess the only thing that truly disappointed me about last night’s election was waking up this morning to find that Donald Trump’s call for “revolution” did not come to fruition. Some people took the news of Obama’s victory last night a little harder than others. But, in fact, it seems as if the world is roughly the same out there.

That’s fine for the moment, but the fact that Mitt Romney can now begin to entertain infomercial offers (or appear on Dancing with the Stars—let the man dare to dream, if that’s what he wants to do with that shell of soulless hate he calls a life) should only be, at best, a brief celebration. I don’t think last night was a case of the lesser of two evils winning out. I think that last night was a case in which a man, despite his flaws, despite the unfortunates of his first term, is still the best man for the job. I think he is the best man for the next four years, and I honestly believe those next four years will continue the slow, critical progress that he worked so hard to establish in his first term.

I’m not sure anyone at Fox News would agree with me though. I don’t have cable, but I understand the party was a bit somber over there last night.

Hi. I don’t fucking matter anymore. (Image © FOX)

Hi. I don’t fucking matter anymore. (Image © FOX)

I wish I could have had cable. I can’t deny that the cast and crew of Fox News being beyond despondent tickles me in ways that are both political and just-plain-weird. I can’t help it. The image of the entire heart and soul of Fox News trying to hold back their tears like a jilted prom date is more arousing to me than a movie starring Sasha Grey, Caroline Pierce and Sophie Dee as a gang of nuns gone horribly, horribly astray.

I’m weird. I get weird kicks. Leave me alone.

There were other stories from last night, certainly. Diane Sawyer can apparently really handle her liquor, Todd Akin was legitimately told to get the fuck out of town, the third-party cats gave a strong enough showing to make me hope one of those parties (Gary Johnson, let’s talk again in 2016, okay?) will get the attention third parties deserve, and the popular vote proved to be a much tighter race than the electoral (which again brings into question the need for an electoral vote in the first place, but that’s a non-fiction epic for another time).

All of those stories, plus meltdowns by sturdy, emotionally-sound people like Victoria Jackson and Donald Trump, are all worth noting, but what I’m hoping for a slew of profoundly more interesting stories in the coming months.

I think another great story from this election is that there is clearly a strong contingent of people who sincerely want to work towards that rattled, misquoted and often abused concept of a better world. Your political beliefs are your own, and although I feel like Tiny Tim (the Dickens character, not the dead singer) after nine shots of Christmas punch for even saying this, but I really hope that what’s going to endure beyond this election is the energy.

People want to fix things, or continue to fix the damage of horror shows like the Bush administration. The election is over, and the fighting, the silly Facebook memes, all of it, is now finished for the duration (okay, probably not the Facebook stuff, but humor me).

People want to go to work on the wounds of this country. Great. Shouldn’t that be enough? Are we not at a point where it really shouldn’t matter what we believe politically? I still think the current administration is doing good work, and that they will continue to do good work through to 2016, but just voting, as glorious as that is, is not enough. There is so much to be done, and there are so many things that need the collective attention, care and energy of the people. We are at a point where that energy and desire are sorely needed.

Voting is fine, but it’s really only the beginning. So, you know, let’s shut the fuck up, and go to work.

Election Night Diary by Lily Murphy

The Choice: Election 2012

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