I’m missing chunks of my childhood
that I fill in on the spot like ad libs
whenever someone asks
or references a year I’m not sure I was around for 

I have to ask myself what children do
ask my students what they do
add some nostalgic twists
like the ending of cassette tapes,
the introduction of CDs and dial up internet
and voila: my childhood—
as normal as anyone else’s.

my pain gotta be put on a pedestal to be believed
I gotta shout hashtag me too to be heard 

are you sure he did what you say he did? 

are you sure he didn’t?
what’s the perfect victim 
supposed to sound like anyway?
am I supposed to shy away from streetlamps 
as to not be seen,
stutter every time I say his name? 

he’s my brother. 
explain that to my patchwork brain

Ashley Elizabeth (she/her) is a writing consultant, teacher, and poet. Her works have appeared in SWWIM, Memoir Mixtapes, and Zoetic Press, among others. Her chapbook, you were supposed to be a friend, is available at Nightingale & Sparrow (June 2020). When Ashley isn't serving as assistant editor at Sundress Publications or working as a member of the Estuary Collective, she habitually posts on Twitter and Instagram (@ae_thepoet). She lives in Baltimore, MD with her partner and hopefully soon a few furry friends.